26 January 2012

Letter to Mom

Tonight I was writing an email to my mom and some of the stuff I was writing seemed appropriate to share in a more global fashion, so here’s a sampling of my thoughts to my mom:

“I remember talking with you and dad earlier this school year about perspective and how I just didn't have any. For the first half of this year, you and dad and friends from back home gave me perspective about my situations and prayed that God would help me trust without seeing the reasons behind them. I feel like God is finally starting to reveal a bit of His plan. I still don't know entirely why I'm here in Mexico, of all places. But I get to go to Kenya, I have a friend who's dad is a doctor and can give me all my shots (and probably could help me out with the malaria injections if I were to get that after I get back), I'm learning new tricks to use in the classroom, I'm starting to build some relationships and with whom I might have a positive impact, I'm getting to see and experience some cool things, and at this point, the more I release my worries and stresses to God, He show's me that my future is all planned out. For a while I was stressed about figuring out how to get my vaccinations, where the money would come from to get me to Kenya, what I am going to do after this year, if I'll even survive the rest of this school year--you know, typical stuff. God has it all under His control, and I'm gaining more perspective on that.

I know things can seem pretty bleak because of life circumstances, but I keep coming back to God's promise in Jeremiah 29. Like the Israelites, I think we're in exile; it may not take the same form as it did in history, but I think God's promise holds just as true to us today as it did then: "'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,' says the Lord. 'I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land.'" (vs 11-14). My captivity may look more like self-pity or depression, but God says if I pray to Him, He
will listen, and that if I look for Him, He will be found. Sometimes (MOST times) I wish that He would reveal Himself a little sooner, but He promises that He will!”

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