14 March 2013

My Life as a Cockroach

Sometimes I feel like a cockroach.*

No, I don’t scatter in the light, nor do I congregate in mass with others like me (except on Sundays).  But have you ever noticed that when a cockroach nears the end of its life, it will flip over on its back? 

Today as I was pinning a piece of fabric to hem on the floor of my room, I found a dead cockroach on his back.  Not wanting to pick him up and dispose of his carcass at that moment in time, I blew at him to move the body out of the way.  When the air hit his little body, it flipped him over and he wiggled his legs—“not dead yet” as my father would say quoting one of his favorite movies of all times.  After a few unsteady rocks, he flipped over on his back again.

Myriad circumstances cause me to flip over on my back (death not being one yet), primarily exhaustion—physical, mental, and/or spiritual.  Occasionally a puff of encouragement will come from a friend and it will flip me back on my feet, but not being ready yet, I flop back over.  Unlike a cockroach, I’m not giving up on living.  I simply need some time to just lay there. 

As I observed the cockroach and made my ponderings, the song “Show Me” by Audrey Assad came to mind.  Through the course of the song, the author mentions all the things God can do and the many ways He can use her, but for now she just wants to be and she just wants God to be with her.  I believe God is and will continue to use me for His purposes, and that excites me.  But sometimes I just need to lay on my back like a cockroach, but not dead, and allow God to wash over me.

 

*My use of simile vs. metaphor is intentional.  I am NOT a cockroach but simply share a few characteristics with one.  English lesson over.  Class dismissed!

No comments:

Post a Comment